Of course by now most of us know that this custom dates back to a time when marriages were done at a younger age and this was the parents way of keeping the events light-hearted and fun.

What usually happens is after the mornings hectic schedule of the wedding, in the afternoon time, the newly wed wife calls her husband for play. To add the merriment of one and all gathered follows list of playful games: the bride marking the groom’s feet with color paste; fanning him, showing him a mirror; breaking papads (thin, roasted lentil flour crisps) over each other’s head; wrenching the betel pack from each other’s hand; rolling the coconut from one to another as in ball-play; and so on. During these games, the ladies sing songs poking fun at the bride, groom and the in-laws. In an arranged marriage wedding these games help break the ice for the newly weds. This is definitely one of the lighter moments of the wedding and as a photographer, I get to capture some playfulness & laughter of not only the bride & groom but also the family. Also this is the first time all the family members are in a relaxed state of mind knowing that the wedding is finally over.

What are some of the funniest/funn-est/silliest games you have seen couples play? Share your Nalangu experience here.

• • • • • • Shoots are done mostly outdoors, so we need natural light. Daytime light can be harsh so we always recommend shooting early in the morning (around 5am onwards) and during dusk (around 5pm onwards). It also helps us stay cool ! Keep this in mind when setting a date for your outdoor shoot.

          

           

          • Think about where you want to have your shoot. This could be one single location or several, but don’t think too hard. Usually couples like to cover places that are special to them. Maybe where you had your first date? Or where you went to school? Maybe a sport you like? Basically, anything you like and would like recorded beautifully for posterity.

          If you can’t think of anything, your photographer will come up with something.

           

          

           

          • You want to dress up but at the same time keep it casual. Also, you want to complement each other in your choice of clothing. Blacks and Whites always look good on photos so that’s usually recommended. Black is also slimming, so keep that in mind.  If you’re both fans of the same(or opposing) sports team bring those jerseys. Carry a couple of changes, the more the better. But be sure to stay coordinated. This includes accessories like footwear, jewelry etc.

           

          

           

          • For a really gorgeous set of photos, I’d recommend getting your hair done, a facial a couple of days prior, manicures, pedicures, the works ( guys can do it too ) . It all makes a difference.
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        • • Remember that the first objective is to have fun and get some great shots while we’re at it. So be relaxed and have an open mind. The craziness of the wedding can take its toll on everyone and most couples enjoy this time they get away from it all. It gives you time to focus on each other and just how actually happy you are to be getting married!

           

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The ornate metal cones (back in the day, perhaps made of gold, silver) are called Paruppu Thengaai and they symbolise Shiva and Parvati who are invited to preside over the auspicious event. The cones are usually stuffed with daal (pulses), jaggery & coconut. The conical shape also has significance in vaastu as it is said to absorb positive cosmic energy.

And as with most Hindu traditions, there is another theory, and that being the cones started off as paper cones (the ones we get provisions in some stores even today) , with the bride’s family welcomed the groom’s family with food items in cones after their long journey to the bride’s village. This, evolved into more ornate metal cones like what we see now.

A ring shot on one of the cones.

Weddings are a once in a lifetime event.  The most important day as you move from one stage of your life to another and everything needs to be perfect.  You’ve planned every single detail with utmost care and reviewed and gone over it again and again for months or sometimes years.  All the careful preparation is done and now the day approaches where you will begin a new life and a journey with your soul mate.

It’s up to you to set the tone for your day and you’ll do that, as you get ready.  Your wedding will be a big blur in a few months after it so count on your photographer to capture the moments that make it special and that includes your time getting ready.  So many wonderful moments are shared with family and close friends as your hair, makeup, jewelry and clothes are donned.  This is when the day really begins so ask for shots of you preparing for the wedding and set the right tone for the day relaxed, enjoying yourself, and spending time with those that matter most to you.  I have noticed those brides that are relaxed and happy getting prepared are far more likely to enjoy the rest of the day just as much.

Planning in advance is essential to making your wedding perfect and planning ahead is essential to making your time getting ready for the wedding perfect.  Accessories, hair, makeup, and the dress are the big things requiring the most attention.

Make sure all your accessories are bought well in advance and packed together in one big bag so you’re not scrambling wondering where each piece is in the pile of things you have brought.  Be sure to try them on in advance for fit, comfort, and ensuring the style suits both you and your dress.  Try on the accessories and the dress together well in advance so you know what to expect and how everything will look n you.  If you are not comfortable wearing your dress in advance, try draping it over one shoulder to make everything looks good together on you.

It’s natural to spend a great deal of time shopping for the perfect dress and perfect accessories, but often overlooked is shopping for the best hair and makeup stylist.  Be sure to start well in advance of the wedding visiting a variety of shops to find the stylist that best suits your style and budget.  Have your favorites do your hair and makeup as they would for the wedding.  Hold up your dress and accessories at home to see how it all goes together and look at yourself in a variety of poses.  Be sure to take pictures and have the stylists write notes so that the same look you fall in love with can be recreated exactly n your wedding day.  If you prepare in advance, only you will not be surprised at how beautiful you look when all is done.

The getting ready session is a great opportunity for your photographer to get some amazing shots of you and your closest family and friends.  Shots taken during the makeup session helps complete the story of the day and the wedding and provides pictures of the intimate moments you never want to forget as you begin this important day.  To let you and the pictures truly shine, try to keep the room as clutter free as possible and be sure the mirrors are clean and not spotted or filmy.  Perhaps the hardest will be to try and control the number of people coming in and out of the room.  Just those that are closest and helping you get ready are enough.  You need to be relaxed and having fun rather than continuously being distracted and greeting all the well wishers.

It is perfectly ok to have someone tell them politely not to disturb the bride now since she is getting ready.  It’s better if you just appoint someone to do this for you and let yourself concentrate on getting ready.  This is easier when the wedding happens in a hotel, but in mandaps the bride and groom rooms are close to the main hall so there is a greater chance of guests barging in wanting to take a sneak peek at what’s happening.  You’ll need someone to regulate that for you even more in this situation.  Most importantly, plan for more time that you think you will need.  So many possibilities for what could throw you off schedule that its best to just add more time than your worst-case scenario.  Maybe traffic will hold up the stylist, things might take longer in a strange room, maybe someone forgot the pins and needs to run and get some, or perhaps you just need a few extra minutes just to breathe after seeing yourself in the mirror.  Regardless, that extra time will be used up faster than you can believe so be sure to allow for it so that you stay calm, relaxed, happy, and are enjoying these moments.  Once you are completely ready, be sure to ask your photographer to use any time left to take portraits of you looking your radiant best.  You and your husband will cherish these in the years to come

Remember, by the end of the day you cannot control everything and something will happen that was not planned so stay cool and expect the unexpected. After all, wedding is about you and your betrothed joining together and beginning a new life and not about the details of the day.  So just be yourself, live in the moment, and make your dreams come alive together.

The manthras recited then, translate to:

With God as our guide, let us take:

1. -the first step to nourish each other

• -the second step to grow together in strength
• -the third step to preserve our wealth
• -the fourth step to share our joys and sorrows
• -the fifth step to care for our children
• -the sixth step to be together forever
• -the seventh step to remain lifelong friends,  the perfect halves to make a perfect whole”

After the seventh step the bride remains where she is and says: ”With seven steps we become friends. Let me reach your friendship.  Let me not be severed from your friendship.  Let your friendship not be severed from me.”

In the north, the groom is accompanied by a young boy called sarbala who is usually his nephew.

The significance of te event goes like this – Every man after his student life has two alternatives- Married life or Ascetic life. Wishing to escape the tribulations of married life, the groom, with second thoughts, starts to make his way to the holy city of Kasi or Varanasi with slippers, umbrella, fan etc as his possessions. The bride’s fathers intervenes and advises him of the superiority of married life over ascetic life, promising to give him his daughter as a companion to face the challenges. The umbrella serves to remind him in the future of this advice.

Traditionally dangling on a yellow thread it either contains the images or shiva lingam or namam or a round chakra. It is taken around the mandap to get the blessings of elders. The tying of the manual sutra or thaali takes place during the pre-determined auspicious hour. As soon as the bride comes with the new saree the groom performs some religious rites and then he ties the “mangalyam’ or manual sutra around the netk of the bride. As he does so the Naadhaswaram and drums are braten loud and fast so as to muffle any inauspicious noised at that critical moment. He ties one knot and the sister standing behind the bride completes the other two. This is different with different types of hindu weddings. Sometimes the thaali which is already tied is just dropped on the neck of the bride. Here are some of the pictures from the tying of the knot ceremony in some of the weddings I shot.

Please let me know if you have any significant information about tying the knot or the “mangal sutra’. It will be great to enlighten the masses.

First a shot like this not only needs planning but there are other factors involved which makes it really tough to execute. With all the travel I do and the physical condition of the model we were able to do only once every 3 months. We ended up shooting at the 3rd, 6th, 9th months and 20 days after giving birth. I should thank both the mother and the baby for cooperating and making this idea a reality.